


Shattered Glass

by xItIsWhatItIsx



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Femslash, I'm not going to lie there's a lot of staring into each other's eyes instead of actual plot, Morally ambiguous geniuses discovering they have feelings, POV Eurus Holmes, POV Irene Adler, Post-Season/Series 04, They're just emo and gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2018-12-10 08:37:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11688003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xItIsWhatItIsx/pseuds/xItIsWhatItIsx
Summary: “There is a common saying about the calm before the storm.But no one ever talks about the deafening silence after the storm hit.”Months after the events of the The Final Problem, Eurus starts to talk again.Her first words? "Irene Adler".





	1. Chapter 1

Something was off. They were late. “Must be a new nurse,” Eurus thought. The regular ones were always on time. Not that she was particularly looking forward to yet another bland lunch. Somehow the people who prepared her food did not seem to be aware that spices other than salt existed. She closed her eyes, humming. They were 4 minutes and 23 seconds later than usual now. Maybe someone else had attempted to escape. So many of them had tried over the years, but none of them had succeeded the way she had.

Eurus was sitting on the floor in her old cell, her back leaned against the glass wall that separated it from the rest of the grey room. She could feel the cold creep through her thin blouse, but didn’t even mind that the glass wall had been re-installed; she was still weirdly fascinated by the way her skin reacted to the sensory perception of its icy, smooth surface.

When Eurus did finally hear footsteps approaching (5 minutes 16 seconds later than usual now) she knew something was definitely off. There were two pairs of feet approaching instead of the usual one. One pair…heavy boots, weary pace. Obviously one of the guards. But the other steps were made by someone new. The steps were lighter, faster, sounded sharper. A deep voice mumbled something. There was no reply.

When the heavy security door opened, Eurus stopped humming. Behind her back, her visitor moved further into the room, alone now. Hesitant at first, the steps seemed to grow more confident as the person approached, stopping only two feet in front of the glass wall instead of the advised three.

“You’re shorter than I expected”, Eurus remarked without turning around. The sound of her own voice irritated her for a second. She wasn’t used to speaking out loud anymore.

“Are you one of the people who believe that size does matter then?” came the quick reply.

This was new. Usually the few people who had visited her over the years were scared or confused by the accurate comments she had made about their weight or height without even glancing at them. People were so stupid. No one ever seemed to consider that when you spend most of your life in the same room as she had, it became ridiculously easy to calculate someone’s measurements based on the acoustics in the room. No one had ever reacted as calm to her little game as her current visitor. Interesting.

Of course, Eurus knew who had just walked in and was now standing behind her on the other side of the glass wall. It’s not like her visitors list was very long anyway, but after Sherlock’s last visit she knew it wouldn’t take long for this new guest to arrive.

Finally, Eurus turned around to face the woman standing on the other side of the glass wall. To face _The Woman_ standing on the other side of the glass wall.

Irene Adler. Several seconds passed as Eurus just looked at her visitor. She stood up from the floor. As always, countless thoughts were racing through her mind all at once, but weirdly not a single one seemed to contain any coherent information now. Green dress. She felt the blood rushing though her veins. It was October. Was she supposed to be able to hear the blood moving inside her body? Handbag. The sound of blood flowing through her like a waterfall seemed to drown out every other sound now. Lips. Moving. Forming words?

“The shade is called Scarlet Seduction, in case you were wondering,” Irene said, her bright red lips forming into a half-smile now.

Eurus’ eyes snapped back into focus again. Her heart rate had increased to 87 beats per minute. Odd. Her heart rate never deviated from a steady 71. Her face felt hot. This were typical warning signs for a heart attack. Obviously. Slowly, she met the eyes of The Woman, who seemed genuinely amused at having caught Eurus staring at her lips. Irene took a step forward.

“Please keep away from the glass, Miss!” A deep voice boomed through the speakers and left an echo in the spacious, yet almost empty room. Eurus’ gaze shot to the nearest security camera. She felt a wave of anger rise in her stomach.

But to her surprise, Irene paid absolutely no attention the urgent undertone in the guard’s voice and completely ignored his command. Instead, she just dropped her black handbag to the ground. Eurus noticed that the zipper hadn’t been closed all the way and caught a glimpse of dark blue fabric inside the handbag. A scarf, maybe?

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Irene said. She didn’t seem intimidated by her surroundings at all. “What was I thinking wasting my time with your brother? To be fair though, I had no idea of your existence at the time,“ she sighed. And smiled again. “Clearly, those cheekbones run in the family, but you…” her voice trailed off. Their eyes met again. None of them moved. Seconds passed as they just stood there. For a moment it seemed as if the glass wall between them had vanished completely. Eurus realized she was holding her breath.

“I could drown in those eyes,” Irene whispered, barely audible.

Eurus looked down. What was happening here? She had to remind herself to start breathing again. Had she experienced spontaneous craniocerebral trauma in the last minutes?

Irene cleared her throat. Her voice sounded harder again, louder too. “Well then, why did you ask me here?”

Eurus kept looking at the ground. Somehow, she wasn’t able to lift her head up again. Her own feet didn’t seem to belong to her body anymore. For a split second, she felt the room shift around her and feared she was going to crash face first into the glass wall. Must be an aneurysm rupture. Clearly. But despite her conviction that she would drop dead any second now, Eurus was still able to process every word Irene said next.

“Your brothers were very keen on bringing me here and mentioned something about a matter of the highest urgency, so I’m curious: are we trying to save this nation or watch it burn? I understand you like to play with fire.”

Eurus felt Irene’s eyes on her. Wandering across her body. Gradually taking everything in. Eurus still couldn’t look up. Her own eyes were fixed on the handbag Irene had dropped on the floor. She wanted to open her mouth, but couldn’t. A flesh-eating parasite must have infested her brain, she concluded. That was the only logical explanation at this point.

Eurus wasn’t sure how much time had passed in silence, but she still felt Irene’s eyes on her, patiently watching her with a certain kind of curiosity, when the high security door opened again. One of the guards stepped in.

“Miss Adler, umm the helicopter has paged me ‘n said you’ll need to depart now if ye want to catch yer flight. Said the wind has gotten stronger and it’ll take ‘im ‘bout an hour to the airport now. Doesn’t wan’o get stuck on the island, ye see.”

It seemed to Eurus that he was speaking unnecessarily loud, almost yelling.

“Thank you,” Irene replied calmly, as if that man hadn’t just yelled at her. Eurus began to wonder whether her senses were shutting down one after the other. Was she even still fully conscious?

Without moving her eyes away from Eurus, Irene slowly grabbed her leather bag from the floor. “Well then, I guess we’ll need to continue our little…rendezvous at another time. It was lovely to meet you, Eurus Holmes.”

Something about the way Irene pronounced her name finally woke Eurus’ brain up again.

Airport? Several thoughts came crashing down on Eurus now. One thought in particular seemed to form in the back of her mind. One hour to the airport? It was like an alarm went off in her head. She suddenly felt dizzy. Every time she tried to focus on that thought, it evaded her. It was like trying to hold on to smoke. The dress. The handbag. The scarf… Numbers and letters in no apparent order began to race through her mind, almost visible in front of her eyes.

Irene had turned around and began to walk away from her. Each step she made in her high heels sounded to Eurus as if someone had fired a gun right next to her head. Irene seemed to walk away from her faster than humanly possible. At the same time, things seemed to move in slow motion around Eurus. Her left hand hurt. The security door had opened and Irene had stepped over the threshold. A pinching sound filled Eurus’ head now. Screaming. Was she actually dying right then and there? She closed her eyes.

Hold on. She could make out individual words among the screams now. DON’T. SAFE. Suddenly she realized that the screams were not only filling her head. She could hear them echoing back from the grey walls around her.

“Don’t board that plane! It’s not safe in Ankara tonight!”

Oh. In the following seconds, three realizations hit Eurus all at once. She recognized the panicked screams as her own voice. She looked down at her left hand and saw that she was bleeding. She must have punched the glass wall. When did that happen? Somehow the third realization was the worst. She looked up and saw that the security door had closed again. Irene Adler was gone.


	2. Chapter 2

“…constantly monitoring everything going on in there, so we can let you out right away.”

Irene Adler looked up. She’d been mesmerized by what she saw on the monitor up on the wall and had barely listened to the instructions of the guard in front of her. The monitor only showed black and white images of what was happening on the other side of the security door, but Irene was captivated by the subtle movements of the hands of the woman she saw on the screen. She seemed to effortlessly make the Stradivarius sing and even through the old loudspeakers the melody sounded powerful. Irene cast a last glance at the monitor. There she was, long dark curls flowing down over her shoulders, eyes closed, playing the violin.

The East Wind.

A shiver ran down Irene’s spine. Was that because of the eerie hallways she’d been led down once more to arrive here or because of the intense stare the security guard was giving her now? His eyes never met hers, but wandered across her body while he spoke, surely imagining what she looked like beneath her dark silk blouse. Creep, she sighed internally. Even though the guard referred to the security door Irene was now walking through as the “gate to hell” she felt almost relieved when she heard the many locks click heavily behind her. She needed answers.

Once inside the cell, Irene didn’t move for a few seconds. Somehow it felt wrong to interrupt the melancholy music that filled the air. And yet she knew that she questions she had come here to ask could not wait any longer. Her heels created an echo in the large room. Eurus Holmes kept playing the violin until Irene paused in front of the glass wall that separated the room, all the while maintaining eye contact with her visitor. Irene tried to read the expression in Eurus’ eyes. Was that a hint of surprise she saw in the otherwise expressionless face of the youngest Holmes sibling? Or was it…delight? Eurus lowered the violin, almost wary. Waiting quietly.

“Who told you?” Irene began. She tried to sound calm and collected, but a soft quiver in her voice gave her insecurity away.

“I wasn’t sure whether you’d listened to me,” Eurus said, not unkind.

“There were only two people who knew I would board that plane to Ankara that night, and I took the necessary precautions to make sure they would be discrete,“ Irene went on, ignoring Eurus’ remark.

“ _Three_ , actually,” Eurus corrected her.

No. This was impossible. “Who else?” Irene asked, her voice almost a whisper now. “Who gave you this information?”

Now Eurus openly smiled at her.

For a moment, Irene remembered Mycroft’s words. “My sister likes to play games”, he had said to Irene when he had brought her to Sherrinford for the first time. “Don’t you think life would be extremely dull without a few games?” she had asked in return, surprised about the pained expression that had momentarily cast a shadow over his face. He had quickly changed the topic then and left her wondering whether this was due to shame…or fear. No one had ever explained to her why exactly Eurus was locked away in this maximum security facility, but Irene hadn’t been afraid of Eurus when she’d first met her. She had been intrigued. Now she wondered whether Eurus was playing one of those “games” Mycroft had mentioned with _her_.

Eurus took a step towards her, still smiling. In her right hand she held the bow of the violin and now began to gently sway it from left to right, almost absentmindedly. Irene followed it with her eyes, not caring that the confusion she felt must be written plainly on her face at this point.

How could Eurus have known about her plans? She had decided for Ankara as the next destination for her voluntary exile - as Irene liked to call her ongoing escape - less than two hours before she’d come to Sherrinford that day. She had learnt to hide her tracks over the past years, never communicating with the same people twice, always using a different alias, and yet somehow Eurus had known, had even warned her. “She’s saved my life”, Irene realized, perplexed.

Suddenly Eurus stopped moving the bow in mid-air and tapped its end against the glass wall between them. Irene startled and looked up.

“Why… _you_ told me”, Eurus smirked. “Wasn’t that obvious?”

Irene froze. How was this possible? After what had happened _that last time_ , she had been even more careful with every word that passed her lips; every movement she made was planned out minutely, every risk she took calculated. “The Holmes family will be the end of me,” she thought.

Eurus scanned her face and gradually stopped smiling. “Hmm…maybe I do owe you an explanation.” Irene was surprised to notice that there was no hint of mockery in her voice. The fact that Eurus almost sounded disappointed only added to her confusion.

Irene studied the face of the incarcerated woman in front of her. She was pale, her skin almost as white as her baggy clothes, a sharp contrast to the dark brown waves of hair that framed her face. Yet, as before, it were Eurus’ bright blue eyes that fascinated Irene the most. She tried to find answers in them, about what Eurus was really playing here, but also about who Eurus _was_. What had she done that required her to spend her life like this? Irene felt a sudden pang of sadness when it occurred to her that while she would be able to leave this dreadful island at the end of the day, Eurus would have to remain where she was, hidden from the world, alone. A quiet voice at the back of her mind raised the question whether her own life was so much different. After all, wasn’t that was she’d been doing for years now, hiding from the world, always on the run?

“Please, enlighten me,” Irene finally said.

Eurus walked over to the table in her cell and put down the violin and bow.

“Awful weather we’re having lately, isn’t it?” she said casually. “They let me read the weather forecast in the newspaper every day,” she added as she turned back around to Irene. Her visitor frowned. Where was Eurus going with this? “They never allow me to read the interesting parts, though, only the page with the weather forecast, you know, the one that has all those silly clothing advertisements at the bottom,” Eurus added.

“I don’t see how the weather forecast or clothing-,“ Irene hesitated. Of course. Without being aware of it, a small smile appeared on her lips. Why hadn’t she thought of this sooner? The green dress she had worn during her last visit at Sherrinford, its fabric too thin for autumnal England, must have struck Eurus as odd. The natural talent for deduction clearly was a dominant trait in the Holmes family.

“While I do admire your eye for detail, it still is quite a big leap from seeing a summer dress worn in autumn to the prediction of my travel destination, don’t you think?” she asked.

Eurus cocked her head to the side. “Obviously,” she replied. There was that smile again.

“That green dress really isn’t your favourite, though, is it?" Sherlock Holmes' younger sister went on. "Look at you. You didn’t buy this blouse, you had it made for you specifically, tailored to your measurements. Your nail polish exactly matches your jewellery. And yet you’d _forgotten_ to have that green dress ironed? Unlikely. You didn’t even care about the little stain on the hem of the dress either. Why? Because that’s how other people walk around all the time. Trust me, I recognize a disguise when I see one. And you were in a rush. You _really_ wanted to catch that flight. You didn’t even zip your handbag all the way up. Why would you carry a scarf in your hand luggage when you’re flying to a sunny destination? Unless you would draw less attention to yourself when you wore the scarf around your head as soon as you left the plane, of course. Admittedly, the guard for once had something useful to say when he barged in. There’s only one airport you can reach from this island in an hour by helicopter. There were only three more planes leaving from there that evening. And you clearly weren’t going to either Stockholm or Washington in that outfit. Do you know what I do in here all day, besides reading the weather forecast? My brother asks me to help him sometimes. Looking at what planes are scheduled to leave British airports on a specific day, comparing flight numbers to codes used by terrorist cells, that sort of thing. Now you’d think that most terrorists would at least try to put an effort into planning their little schemes. But no, most of them communicate via social media nowadays. Where’s the fun in that? There’s no secrecy if you know where to look. It’s not even a challenge to guess their passwords anymore. Pathetic, really...” Eurus’ voice trailed off. Her eyes seemed to look at something far away, distracted by her own thoughts. She appeared to be genuinely surprised when she heard Irene chuckle.

“Amazing,” Irene remarked, relief flowing through her body now. She felt her shoulders relax. No one had betrayed her _this_ time. She was safe, or at least as safe as she could ever be, considering the life on the run she’d grown accustomed to by now. “I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t extremely attracted to you right now...” It felt good to have her usual confidence back, too. “There’s just one thing I don’t understand. _Why_?”

For once, it was Eurus’ turn to look puzzled. “Why?” she repeated.

“You knew about the riots in Ankara before they happened,” Irene elaborated. “And don’t get me wrong, I do very much appreciate you effectively saving my life, I’m just not exactly sure why you warned me not to board that plane. Your eldest brother certainly wouldn’t have wasted too many tears on me.”

When Eurus remained silent, Irene tried to find the answer in her eyes again. She found the same expression there that had already struck her as so fascinating during her first visit to Sherrinford. If she didn’t know any better... She’d seen this very expression before in other people’s eyes. More often than she’d cared to count, actually. And yet, it was completely different with Eurus. She was _exceptional_. Mycroft had said that the only feelings Eurus was capable of experiencing were anger and fear. But there was something else here, Irene realized.

Eurus still hadn’t answered her question when she turned around and walked back to her violin on the table. Slowly, she began to fidget with the musical instrument as if it had suddenly occurred to her that the strings of the Stradivarius needed tuning. This was all it took for Irene to know why Eurus had really warned her on that fateful day.

“Say, do you think your brother might do without your help for a couple of hours next week, on Wednesday afternoon, perhaps?” Irene asked.

Perplexed, Eurus turned around to face Irene again. “What?”

“I was just thinking...I’d like to thank you for saving my life. What do you think, Eurus Holmes, would you let me take you on a date?”

Irene was pleasantly surprised to notice the faintest hint of a blush appear on Eurus’ face.


	3. Chapter 3

“Too tight?”

Eurus just glared at him.

“Not like you had a choice anyway, eh?”, the guard sneered as he clicked another handcuff shut around Eurus’ wrist.

When his eyes met hers, the condescending grin on his face gave way to a sudden flash of fear, and he hastily backed away from her. 

“Stage one complete”, he mumbled into his handheld transceiver as he walked back to assume his assigned post at the door.

Eurus sighed as her eyes wandered to the security camera installed on the ceiling. Mycroft _loved_ this over-the-top military talk. She looked directly into the lens of the camera, sure that Big Brother was watching in his office right now, and raised her eyebrows. The fascinating thing about siblings, she had concluded, was that you didn’t even need to say a single word to them and yet could make it perfectly clear that you thought they were being ridiculous. The little red light next to the camera lens kept steadily flashing in response.

After a couple of minutes, she heard the heavy steel door open behind her, closely followed by the now almost familiar sound of high heels on concrete.

Irene Adler walked straight to the large table in the middle of the room and sat down across from Eurus.

“It’s lovely to see you again,” she said, her red lips forming into a bright smile.

" _Scarlet Seduction_ , indeed", Eurus thought.  “Likewise,” she whispered.

It was the first time Eurus saw Irene wear her hair down. The long, smooth waves of brown hair that were falling over her shoulders made her features appear softer. Eurus noticed once more how Irene’s elegant aura drastically contradicted their surroundings.

If Irene felt in any way intimidated by the sterile room equipped with only a large table and two chairs that were bolted to the floor, she was amazing at hiding it. In fact, Irene hadn’t paid any attention to the guards that stood at either side of the door behind Eurus. Nor had she acknowledged the fact that Eurus’ ankles and wrists where chained to the heavy chair, the chains so short that she couldn’t even place her hands on the table right in front of her.  

“I must say, this is quite an unusual setting for a first date…” Irene began, her eyes wandering over the bleak walls before resting on Eurus’ face. “But I’ve always been quite fond of the unusual.”

Eurus felt the heat rise to her face again. How odd, she reflected. She had never, not once in her life, experienced this sensation before she’d met Irene Adler and was yet to find a rational explanation for the phenomenon.

“Has anyone ever told you that you look astonishingly beautiful with a bit of colour in your cheeks?” Irene mused.

“Beauty is a cultural construct created to justify the prevalence of basic procreational intentions in social interactions between members of a society that deems itself highly developed,” Eurus replied. For some reason she regretted saying these words as soon as they’d left her mouth.  She looked down at her hands and noticed that she was fidgeting with the chain of her handcuffs. Eurus looked up in surprise when she heard Irene laugh.

“I couldn’t agree more,” she said. Leaning forward on her chair and placing her hands on the table, Irene added: “But there’s a certain _excitement_ in the exploration of this construct, don’t you think?”

“Absolutely,” Eurus smirked.

Suddenly Eurus became painfully aware of the fact that this was the first time that she was in a room with Irene without a glass wall separating them. Somehow this realization irritated her. In this moment, the security cameras and speakers in the room as well as the guards at the door bothered her more than they had done in years. She wanted to be alone with Irene, just the two of them. Her eyes moved over Irene’s arms bare arms. "She looks so fragile," Eurus thought.

It was the first time that this thought made her feel…what? Of course, she was aware of how _breakable_ people were both physically and emotionally. Yet, connecting this fact with the strangely fascinating woman sitting in front of her somehow filled Eurus with…sadness. She wanted to touch Irene’s shoulder. Touch her and… Eurus’ thoughts blurred.

The next emotion that hit her like a tidal wave was more familiar to her: her whole body seemed to burn with anger when she remembered all the things she’d read about Irene in Mycroft’s database. All the times Irene had had to flee, run and hide to narrowly escape death. She would have greatly enjoyed snapping the necks of all the people who had intended to harm Irene. "Why do you have such a strange effect on me?", Eurus wondered while her eyes were wandering across Irene's face, trying to find the answer in every angle of The Woman's complexion.

Eurus knew that Irene was hardly extraordinary from a statistical perspective. Slightly below average in height, Irene made up for that deficiency by wearing shoes with heels so high she was significantly increasing her risk of foraminal stenosis as a long-term consequence, Eurus concluded. Moving the numbers around in her head, Eurus quickly calculated how Irene could reduce the risk of damages to her spine.

“Six inches is way too much for you…” Eurus muttered absentmindedly.

Irene chuckled. “Oh, my experience begs to differ, I’m afraid” she remarked with a coy smile.

At that remark, one of the security guards behind Eurus awkwardly cleared his throat.

Her line of thought dissolved into thin air at that distraction, Eurus became aware that Irene’s eyes rested on her. She wondered how many seconds had passed. How long had she been occupied by her own thoughts again?

“4,2 inches,” Eurus stated. When Irene questioningly raised her eyebrows, she quickly added “…based on your measurements, your heels shouldn’t be higher than that if you want to avoid irreversible health issues.”

“Based on my measurements, you say?,” Irene said, coquettishly lowering her eyes. “You never fail to amaze me, Eurus Holmes.” She slowly pushed her hair behind her ear and looked straight into Eurus’ eyes.

“So, there's one thing I haven't been able to make sense of yet...” Irene slowly began. “That first time I was brought in to see you – why was I _really_ here?”

Eurus froze. She’d anticipated that question from the very moment she’d opened the folder labelled “Adler, Irene” on Mycroft’s computer.

It had been a dull day several weeks ago and while Eurus generally refrained from leaving the overbearing walls of Sherrinford now, she couldn’t help sneaking into Mycroft’s office to read about what was going on in the outside world now and then. Bored and annoyed with the headlines of the day, she’d found much more interesting input on Mycroft’s hard drive.

As she browsed through folders about Britain’s Most Wanted (what would Mycroft’s little employees think of him if they knew the nation’s most delicate secrets were protected by the password _LadyBracknell72_?), she’d clicked on Irene’s folder – and had not been disappointed. Compared to all those other boring criminals, Irene Adler’s records conveyed that she was not only smart, but had been truly creative when playing with her brothers a couple of years ago. Eurus had looked at the most recent surveillance photos stored in the folder and found herself fascinated by the blurry images of Irene Adler leaving a bar in Budapest. In the days following her little digital excursion, she couldn’t stop thinking about _The Woman_ , as Irene had been referred to in several of the files, and after a thorough risk assessment Eurus had decided to bring up her name during Sherlock’s next visit...

Intensely aware of how close Irene was sitting to her now, Eurus inhaled deeply. She could feel her heart pound in her chest. She really needed to inform one of the nurses that she seemed to be awfully close to sudden cardiac arrest lately. The handcuffs around her wrists felt like they were interrupting her blood flow. Was her brain still receiving enough oxygen?

“Mycroft got it wrong,” Irene said quietly. The playful glimmer had vanished from her eyes and her voice was more sincere now. "I'm not here because you want to play a new _game_ , am I? This has nothing to do with your past, or mine. It's more than that...isn't it?"

Eurus swallowed. She attempted to risk assess the benefits of telling Irene the truth, but couldn’t focus. Every time she tried to form a coherent cause–effect scenario in her head, the possible outcomes evaded her. She looked down at her hands again. Somehow she couldn’t meet Irene’s eyes anymore.

“I…was curious about you,” Eurus finally said. “I get bored quite easily, you know. Most people are just so dull. But with you it’s different. I…want to get to know you.”

She’d spoken so quietly that she wasn’t sure whether Irene had heard her at all. But she must have done, because, for the first time since Eurus had met her, Irene Adler was speechless.

Eurus flinched when the heavy steel door behind her was suddenly thrown open.

“Miss Adler, would you come with me, please?” A guard’s voice.

Eurus’ head sunk lower. A familiar feeling of hopelessness washed over her. And yet, she had anticipated this, hadn’t she? She’d already calculated that Mycroft would only allow Irene’s visits for as long as it took him to find out why exactly Eurus had shown any interest in her. She knew that in his own risk assessment, figuring out whether his little sister was planning another escape had the highest priority.

“What's going on here?” Irene asked. Despite the guard’s instruction, she hadn’t moved an inch.

“Miss Adler, I am obliged to inform you that I am instructed to use any means necessary to escort you from this room,” the guard said.

Irene still made no move to get up from her chair and follow him outside. After a few seconds of pressing silence in the room, he began to walk towards her.

When he was five feet away from her, Irene coldly said “Don’t you dare touch me.”

Perplexed, the guard actually stopped and watched as she slowly got up from her chair.

“Thank you for your cooperation,” he said and pointed towards the door.

Unhurriedly, Irene began to walk towards the door. She was looking straight ahead, seemingly ignoring Eurus, whose head was still lowered.

As she was walking past Eurus, Irene abruptly made three quick steps towards the table and kissed Eurus on the cheek before any of the guards had even realized what was happening.

* * *

Later that night Eurus was back in her cell, sitting on the floor in front of the glass wall. She couldn’t remember how exactly she had gotten back there or how long she had been sitting there looking at her own reflection. She was staring at the red stain Irene’s lipstick had left on her cheek.

Eurus couldn’t help but repeat the last words Irene had said to her. Over and over they were running through her mind, making less and less sense as time went on. After a while, Eurus wondered whether she wasn't just making this up. And yet, that lipstick stain seemed to be proof that it had really happened after all.

Her lips right next to Eurus’ ear, only seconds before being grabbed by two of the guards and hauled from the room, Irene had whispered something. This had been a mere instant before one of the guards had activated the blaring alarm with its siren that immediately drowned out any other sound; the shrill, piercing noise that physically hurt, pulling at your nerves, all of them at once, tearing them apart. At least that's how Eurus felt every time she was forced to hear it, waiting for what seemed like an eternity until someone in the governor's office showed enough mercy to switch the alarm off again.

Eurus' ears had been ringing with that alarm for hours afterwards, or was it longer than that? It could have been only a few minutes as well, she wasn't sure, had she blacked out at some point? As Eurus watched her own reflection in the glass wall, trying to figure out how much time had passed, Irene's last words to her were creating an echo at the back of her mind.

Barely audible, Irene had said: “I’ll come back for you.”


	4. Chapter 4

A cold breeze messed up her hair and momentarily blurred Irene’s view as she set her right foot on the ground. Once she had left the helicopter she looked around, confused as to where exactly they had brought her. The helicopter was quickly climbing back into the air as she took in the grassy hills to her left. To her right, flat dunes domineered the view. Even though the grey sky above seemed to dull all the colours around her she was immediately intrigued by this place.  She couldn’t remember the last time she had been surrounded by so much silence.

The only sound now was the howling of the wind, which temporarily even drowned out the crashing of the waves. The only speck of colour seemed to be a bright yellow figure several hundreds of meters in front of her on the beach. “Now I know why they’d insisted I wear flat heels”, she thought as she began to walk closer to the shore, carefully treading over the rough pebbles on the beach.

As she got closer, Irene almost felt as if she was stepping out of reality. Seeing this woman here on the beach - her head turned towards the water, staring off into the distance - it all seemed oddly out of place. It was the first time Irene saw Eurus Holmes outside of of Sherrinford. Knowing that this was in fact the first time Eurus had been _allowed_ to leave the maximum security institution in over twenty years made a shiver run down her spine. “It’s absurd,” she thought, not sure whether this thought was referring to the concept of being locked away for such a long time or the oversized yellow windbreaker Eurus was wearing.

Even though Irene was aware that Eurus was several inches taller than her, she seemed small and fragile to her right now. Beneath the big jacket, Eurus was wearing a pair of blue jeans and, weirdly, they’d given her a pair of black rubber boots to complete the look. The first image that came to Irene’s mind at the sight of Eurus in this outfit was a child’s first trip to the beach. As if a little girl’s parents had been worried about their daughter catching a cold. _Or like a person who hasn’t left a perfectly air-conditioned high security environment for most of her life._ Irene felt something tighten in her chest when she realized that Eurus looked utterly lost standing there. It almost seemed as if she didn't know what to do with all this space around her now that she’d been granted a couple of hours of freedom from her cell.

When she was just a couple of meters away, Irene noticed a blue hair band on Eurus’ head. It seemed as much out of place as anything else about Eurus’ outfit, but Irene sensed that this was the one thing Eurus had picked out herself. She was so close to her now that she could have touched her if she’d stretched out her arm. And yet, for the first time in her life Irene felt unsure about how to approach another person. Would the touch of another person make Eurus feel uncomfortable?

One of the guards on the helicopter had instructed Irene on - as he’d called it - “field mission techniques”, rambling on about keeping a safe distance from the _subject_ and assuring her several times that she would be safe and “protected by many eyes” out there. Seeing Eurus stand there now, Irene thought what an idiot that guard had been. If anyone needed protection right now, it seemed to be Eurus.

As if she had heard her thoughts, Eurus slowly turned around to her now. Even on this overcast day, Irene noticed that Eurus seemed to be paler than usual. Eurus just looked at her, not saying a word, and Irene wasn’t sure whether she glimpsed a nervous twitch or a shy smile appear on her lips. Another breeze of wind turned Eurus’ long hair into a tangled mess and she awkwardly tried to flatten down her hair with her hands. In spite of all of this, Irene couldn’t help but smile herself when she found a genuine expression of warmth in Eurus’ eyes.

“You came back”, Eurus whispered in astonishment.

“Of course I did”, Irene replied.

Never one for small talk, as Irene had quickly learnt, Eurus now turned around to look at the sea again and Irene cast her eyes in the same direction. They stood in silence for several minutes while Irene wondered what must be going through Eurus’mind. She was surprised to notice that the silence between them didn’t feel awkward at all. Actually, despite the fact that both of them were fully clothed, shivering in the cold wind, and standing several centimeters apart from each other on an empty beach, Irene felt like she had never experienced a more intimate moment with another person before.

Without being aware of moving a single muscle, Irene slowly moved her arm and gently brushed her hand against that of Eurus. Their hands just barely touching like this, none of them seemed to be able to make another move and in retrospect Irene wasn’t sure how many seconds had passed before Eurus took her hand. Irene felt a sensation of joy wash over her whole body and was amazed by the fact that she could get so excited about something as innocent as holding this woman’s hand.

They were still looking out over the crashing waves when Eurus began to speak. “We used to come here every summer before I was taken away,” she said. “It’s the only place I ever felt…at peace. I can’t believe he remembered that after all.”

“Who?”

“Sherlock. I once told him that this was the happiest place on earth for me. We were so little back then, I was convinced he would never be able to remember it even happened.” Eurus grew quiet.

Irene found herself at a loss of words. She was touched that Sherlock had done something so kind for his sister and brought her here, but at the same time she wondered if it could really undo any of the damage that had been done to Eurus over all those years.  She knew that nothing she could say right now would be able to take a lifetime of pain away from Eurus. Irene gently squeezed Eurus’ hand, tracing little circles on the back of Eurus’ hand with her finger. Several moments passed in silence while their breathing aligned with the sound of the waves. “It’s beautiful here,” Irene said at last.

“How did you do it? Convince Mycroft, I mean?” Eurus asked.

Irene inhaled deeply. She was so used to relying on her own resources at this point, her wit, charm, and planning; she had grown so accustomed to never trusting anyone that it was difficult for her to admit that she couldn’t have done this without help.

“Do you want to sit down?” she asked. Eurus glanced at her from the side and slightly raised her eyebrows before she nodded. “She must be wondering what must have happened for me to ditch all worries about ruining my clothes,” Irene mused as they took several steps back from the shoreline and sat down in the sand.

Looking down at Eurus’ hand still in hers, Irene slowly began to talk.

“I’m not sure if Mycroft ever told you, but…last time I visited you, after the guards dragged me back to the helicopter…I tried to come back the next day. And the day after that.”

“No one told me,” Eurus said. “What happened?”

“They wouldn’t let me see you. I was told that a command had been issued not to admit any visitors. I knew Mycroft was behind this, but he refused to talk to me. A few days later I received a letter. Basically, the letter suggested that if I didn’t want my past to catch up with me I should leave the country again as soon as possible. The letter conveniently also contained a plane ticket to Argentina booked in my name for the following day.”

Irene felt Eurus tighten her grip. She looked over and saw that she was staring straight ahead, her jaw clenched. Eurus' whole body seemed to have tensed up.

“But I couldn’t do it,” Irene quickly continued, trying to calm Eurus down.

Eurus looked at her now, the stern look on her face giving way to confusion. “Why not?”

“Because I knew right then and there that I was done running. Yes, Argentina is lovely, and so were all the other places I’ve been to over the years, but I realized that I can’t do this anymore. If I could be anywhere in the world, I’d want to be…where you are.”

Slowly, as if she needed time to process these words, Eurus lowered her eyes.

“I met up with several former _business_ _partners_ of mine, trying to use whatever leverage I had on them to find a way to see you. Unfortunately, none of them was of any use. I was running out of time, so…I went to see Sherlock. I thought he would enjoy seeing me beg him for help, his saviour complex battling with his urge to gloat about being smarter than me, but he’s changed since I last saw him. In fact, he barely said anything at all. He just looked at me for a long time and instructed me not to leave the country yet. Then his funny little friend showed up and ushered me to leave. Still as rude as always, that Dr. Watson.”

“John has difficulties dealing with strong women,” Eurus said matter-of-factly.

Irene chuckled. “You’re not wrong. Anyway, I didn’t know what else to do, so I waited. For a call, a sign, anything.” _And I hated every single second of it_ , she added in her mind. But how could she say that to Eurus of all people? Irene hadn’t left the house for four days waiting for a message from Sherlock and it had made her feel more desperate and hopeless that being on the run ever had. How had Eurus survived this for _years_?

“When someone finally knocked on my door this morning I was half convinced it was the police sent by Mycroft to arrest me, but it was a cab driver. At first I thought he’d just gotten the wrong address, but when he told me to come with him and instructed me on proper footwear for the occasion, I knew this must be Sherlock’s doing. And here we are.”

Somewhere in the distance a deep thunder rolled through the ominous clouds.

“You’ve skipped the best part, though” Eurus said. “How did he change Mycroft’s mind? Mycroft would rather die than let me leave Sherrinford on his watch. Oh… _did_ he die?” she added, in what sounded to Irene like a tone somewhere between casual curiosity and hope.

“Only his pride,” Irene replied. “I believe this battle was fought with words alone.”

Eurus shook her head. “But Sherlock was never the smart one, he was always too _emotional_ to win against Mycroft’s arguments. Except -,” she paused. “Oh. Maybe his emotions might have been of some advantage in this situation.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s not about what Sherlock said to Mycroft, not really” Eurus explained. “It’s what happened _before_ that matters.” Irene was surprised to see a light shade of blush appear on Eurus’ cheeks before she continued. “It’s about what I said to Sherlock – about you.”

Amused, Irene raised her eyebrows. “And what would that be?”

“Just two words,” Eurus said. “Your name. Your name was the first thing I said to Sherlock when he came to visit me last month. In fact, your name was the first and _only_ thing I said to anyone in over six months. As much as Mycroft may regret this on a personal level, Sherlock must have reminded him that he couldn’t possibly keep denying you contact with me. Not if you were the one person to achieve what none of the doctors and therapists had been able to do -”

“—making you speak again.” Irene slowly finished her sentence. Her throat felt tight. She could feel tears rise in her eyes. At the same time, she couldn’t help but grin.

Eurus reciprocated her smile. Only that it didn’t reach her eyes.

“But this is not a long-term solution, is it? They will always take me back.” There was no doubt in Eurus’ remark, only resignation.

“Not for several hours, though” Irene said. She moved closer to Eurus and brushed a strand of her dark locks out of her face. She was moving closer to Eurus when something at the corner of her eye caught her attention. Irene turned her head and thought she saw a red glare in the distance, somewhere far back in the tall grass beyond the beach. She noticed that the sky looked almost black now and felt the first raindrop fall on the back of her hand just then.

When she turned back around to face Eurus she realized what had just caught her eye. Several red lasers were targeting Eurus’ back. Irene inhaled sharply. That’s what the guard had meant when he talked about Irene being _protected by many eyes._ They were ready to shoot Eurus with tranquilizers in case she tried to hurt Irene or escape.

Distracted by her discovery, Irene barely even registered a second raindrop land on her arm. It was only when she felt Eurus squeeze her hand that she took a closer look at her face again. And realized that it wasn’t raining at all. Tears were slowly streaming down Eurus’ cheeks. Irene wrapped her arms around Eurus and pulled her closer to her body. Shielding Eurus’ body with her own, Irene placed a kiss on Eurus’ head, right on top of her blue hair band. “Do you trust me?” she whispered.

Eurus lifted her head and their eyes met. Both of them flinched when the sound of an approaching helicopter grew louder. “Drop your weapons!” a voice from the speakers sounded from the sky. Irene was relieved to see the red lasers vanish from Eurus’ back as soon as the shooters realized whose helicopter the command had just come from.

“Is that-?” Eurus began.

“I _may_ have asked Sherlock to help us out a little more. To be fair, I didn’t expect him to hijack one of Mycroft’s helicopters, but I thought maybe it would be nice to take you out for dinner before you have to head back to Sherrinford?”


End file.
